In which I attempt to explain this madness.
The people at Rotten Tomatoes must be HIGH because they only gave this gem of cinematic beauty a SEVENTEEN PERCENT rating. Let's break down all the reasons why they're wrong, and Will Smith, Kevin Kline and Kenneth Branagh will always — ALWAYS — be right.
Assassin's Creed may have lost the plot, but it didn't lose sight of what's really important: Michael Fassbender, shirtless. Bravo, Assassin's Creed, bravo.
Rotten Tomatoes says it's "lacking in campy fun" and suggests a "speedy unraveling for the Dark Universe." I say, let's all get along and have whatever the fuck Tom Cruise is drinking from the Fountain of Youth.